Thursday, October 14, 2010

Can we talk about Boobs?

Innitially, I was only going to talk about my own, but I'm also going to comment on all you wonderful BOOBs out there in Bloggerville.

About my own.... Okay, what's the deal people?  Every time I've lost weight not an ounce of it has been from my girls, BUT when I have then gained the weight back they have absolutely gotten their fair share.  AND each time the get saggier.  So they've gotten steadily bigger and saggier (as if gravitiy wasn't already taking its own toll).

Did anyone ever hear Maya Angalou on Oprah many, many moons ago say in her amazingly beautiful, rich, expressive voice "My breasts are in the midst of a race.  To see which of them will reach my knees first."  (now read that quote again and really try to hear it in her voice - maybe the most unexpectedly funny thing I ever heard, I'm pretty sure I did a spit take right there in my living room - and I probably don't have the quote exactly correct, but it's close).

But I digress.  My point here is floppiness.  Big, sloppy, floppiness.  I'm nearing 30 lbs down which is superfantastic, but my holy goodness these girls are beginning to frighten me.  If they are not oozing out of some bra, they too are racing towards my knees - hell maybe my ankles. 

Clearly, I think I know what my gift to myself will be when I hit goal.  Boobs that are somewhere in the vacinity of where they should be and a whole lot less floppy - they just can't handle this periodic size increase.  This is the last time girls, I swear!!

Now - to all you BOOBs out there.  My heart is breaking for each and every one of you that is struggling right now.  I wish I could take a quick world tour and visit each of you to give you a hug.  From the outside over here (I hope no one is offended by my opinion) it seems that maybe you all worked so hard and planned so hard and focused so hard for so long on Chicago that there is a bit of a void now in your lives.  This thing that took up so much time and mental energy - that kept you focused on your physical goals (and maybe some mental ones too) is over. 

It was clearly an amazing experience but then you came home to... husbands and partners and kids and work and school and homework and dirty toilets and, and, and.  And while all of those things aren't bad at all (well maybe the toilets and the homework) they aren't this amazing thing that kept you focused on your goals.  It's just life in all its wonderful, messy glory.  Maybe a bit mundane as you've been doing it for a long time now.

Maybe like Joey suggested, some sort of challenge is in order.  Maybe a little goal focusing with all these other wonderful, supportive BOOBs can help you all get back in fighting form?  Anyway, please know I'm thinking of all of you and sending positive energy and strength out to all of you.


Drazil said...

You're so sweet - I think that's exactly it. BOOBS was soooo fun - and now we are back to real life - which can be so un-fun. Thanks for your kind words. You're so nice!

Joey said...

I hate to break it to you, but chances are your boobs will win that race. I counter it with a great bra.

I'm up for a challenge! I love the way Kristen would host them. I'd check every monday to see the results. I have an idea to make it easier for the host, though. I'd rather not host it myself because I want to win and that seems unethical. Geez, competitive much?

Read said...

But wait Joey, what's your idea for how to host? If you tell me which blog is Kristin's (I'm still new here) I will promise to look at how she's hosted in the past and possibly consider hosting if no one else is willing...

Maria said...

Even at almost 60 lbs down, I haven't seen much change in the girls. It's very weird!

I think you are right about the return to normal life being a bit of a letdown. I have my own little challenge in place, but I'd definitely join a group one if someone does it!

Fluffy said...

Read - I feel ya on the post. Not only are mine floppy, saggy, whatever - they are EMPTY! As in, I wear an "A" cup. Thought about looking into boobs, but have been going back and forth on it - who knows.

The last sentence. When you said "all you supportive BOOBS" or something like that---all I could think of is BRAS...OK, maybe I'm just a dork, but it made me laugh.