Thursday, March 10, 2011

Tonight's brain farts...



I'm totally stealing from Tessie Rose and Kagead... so sue me.

  • I totally want to do a whole post using the authentication words you get when commenting on a blog post.  Today's favorite is synfele - (Latin-to sin with feeling)  Or maybe just start dropping them in here and there - maybe with a little index at the bottom with my definitions for them included....  (I even kept a word document going for a while listing them because I was so amused and maybe also a little obsessive.)
  • I've recently discovered that 1 10 year old son + 14 stitches = way too much eating of way too much comfort food for mommy.  Perhaps I should have just gotten bombed that first night instead of eating like this for a couple of days.  I hate that it was such an easy and comfortable coat to put on that I didn't even notice I was wearing it for a while.
  • I'm totally annoyed that Kindles aren't backlit -like the kindle ap works out to be on my iphone.  I'm not yet sure I'm totally sold on it - though I think the lighted cover I just ordered which will make it bigger (which I want) and more expensive (which I didn't) and usable in bed at night while Brad's sleeping will go a long way towards me loving it - but the jury is definitely still out at the moment.
  • Why is sex such a taboo subject?  I so want to make that less true - can we start a revolution?  I think some of the best conversations are when people can just be open and honest about what they like and don't like and what works and what doesn't.  Doesn't it make sense to be able to share our knowledge about this subject just like we do about so many others?  Though, oddly I find people look at me funny when I suggest that perhaps they should go home and get laid - or take matters in their own hands - or drop to their knees in front of their partner and rock their world.
  • I've got this crud that's going around and it's fucking pissing me off.  It's not quite bad enough to really knock me down - but it's just slowly leaching the life out of me.  I want it to either kill me and get it over with or leave!
  • I can't spell to save my life.  I wish I cared about that more.
  • Using a 10 key calculator all day everyday has robbed me of the ability to do simple math in my head  (it's a common occupational hazard). I find it a little embarrassing.  People will often look to me, the accountant, when out to dinner to figure out how to split the meal (equally) and determine the tip (20%) - and I seriously can't do the math up there in the little old noggin anymore.  I generally refuse - please don't hate me for that if we're out to eat together in the future.
  • Why does Reese's insist on making peanut butter eggs at Easter time? (and hearts for Valentine's day, and trees at Christmas?)  They're evil I tell you.
  • I think the owner of the Orioles and the owner of the Redskins both have exceptionally small penises that they work hard to overcompensate for by believing they can be the sports directors of their respective teams in addition the owners.  And the years and years and years of evidence to the contrary doesn't seem to stop them from continuing to do it.  (it just goes to show you that the size of the penis is not in direct proportion to how it effects the brain from which it is hanging).

12 comments:

Sandy Lee said...

I just love the BrainFart pic and had to save it to use in a future post. Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou. Maybe I'll print it off and take it in to work for an idiot manager I know who does that a lot.

I'm married to an accountant and he will give the 15% down to the penny after deducting any taxes. I just look at the bill and make a good guess. Who knew leaving a tip isn't really rocket science. No one will even know you didn't calculate. Hope your son is healing well. What a nasty gash. My word was muntisol.
Nope-it's now consts.
Now it's nosesswi. I like that one so will type it in now.

Amber said...

You crack me up...I can't wait to meet you in Chicago. :)

Beth Ann said...

Amen to the Reeses PB egg!

Bonnie said...

It always kind of freaks me out when the authentication word is vaguely like something in the post.

Something About Kellie said...

lol - I think this is the first post I've read that recommends people masturbate or drop to their knoees and give their partner a blow job! Ummmm where to go from here....

I'm speechless...Nice :)

Oh my word is hypact! I have decided it is short for hyper-activity :)

Liz said...

If we ever go out to eat together, I can figure out the bill. I've been a waitress for 12 years and can do it in my sleep (usually, while I am waiting for a table to figure it out, I am staring at them all judgementally!)

Oh, and the Reese's PB egg is the perfect candy. It's the perfect ratio of pb to chocolate...and is therefore evil. I'm interested to see how bad the damage is this year in comparison to years past!

(My word is qiglasm....)

Tina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tina said...

damn damn damn..I just posted a big long comment and then found two typos. I thought I copied it in order to paste it here but actually did not and then deleted it!!!

1. I like those verification words too! I swear they are somehow created from the words in the post because they are so often so appropriate.

2. I have a Ph.D. in mathematics education and I do not do mental math calculations either. I think that stuff if FOR accountants.

3. I am more than ready to talk about sex in person. My problem is that my aunt reads my blog (and God knows how many other family members). I dont want to freak the crud out of my aunt but talking about some romp in the sack with my husband. Feel free however to leave a comment about it. She doesnt have any mental images of you.

4. I do love the peanut butter and chocolate !

5. I am just getting over a similar cold that lasted 3-4 weeks. I hope your recovery is speedy!

6. no comment on the sports thing. I had 4 daughters and managed to avoid most things sporty.

I love your brain farts :) definitely not silent and deadly :)

the word verification is sappl

xxxooo

Heather said...

That picture is classic! Reese's new torture is those minis in a bag. They are seriously deadly!

Theresa aka Tessie Rose said...

Great stuff, however...I'm not a fan of the holiday Reeses, I like the corrugated edge on the original, it stands up to the peanut butter filling much better, but hey....I'd still knock someone down for one!

Kiki said...

Ha ha! I'm also an accountant and get the same nonsense about figuring out the bill. (Either that or my sister who is a math teacher). I always say I'm "off the clock".

Drazil said...

Ahahh - I'm catching up and this is so funny - about being more open about sex - and then I did the XXX rated BYOC. Be careful what you wish for!

And OMG - those Reeses are the death of me. Satan invented them. I swear.

Turn off your word verification - you won't get any spam. I don't and then we don't have to type it in either...which is fun! No?