Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Holy Freakin' Sh#t!!

Holy freakin' shit.  That sums up last night for me.

I decided I could beat that demon apathy and got my ass on the treadmill.  I was building up a good head of steam at about the 20 minute mark when Teddy burst into the room.

Ted: Mom, come quick!  I think Jack needs stitches.
Me: Fuck!  (cuz you know Brad's out of town!!!  Things only happen when Brad's out of town.) 

Jack has a kitchen towel (thankfully he grabbed a clean one out of the drawer as I discovered when I went to get another one and found blood spatter in the drawer) pressed to his forehead and he's screaming.  I get him to show me and it's a 2.5 - 3 inch gash in the middle of his forehead - think Harry Potter only it's straight.

Sure enough Jack needed stitches.  They were playing frisbee and Jackson was running for the frisbee at top speed and his forehead collided with a metal mailbox.  Ted says his head shot back and his feet kept going, I'm damn glad I missed the visual of that.

While in the ER waiting room, my anxiety prone child spends a fair amount of time hunched over the toilet thinking he's going to throw up at just the prospect of stitches.  Eventually we make it back to the doctor (the nurse has already numbed the area with this cool topical paste) and she looks to see how deep it is and discovers it's straight through the muscle and down to the bone.  How delightful.  She wants a plastics consult - which I wanted as well - though our hospital doesn't have plastics on call.  It's affiliated with Johns Hopkins, but it isn't Hopkins.  She calls plastics and she has two little kids at home and her husband is out of town so she can't come.  We discuss transferring down to Hopkins to see plastics - while Brad is arranging via phone a plastics consult for the next morning with a friend of a friend.  Ultimately I decide more waiting would be just too much for Jackson as it had already been several hours by this point and get the pediatric ER doc to do it.  She was great.

So picture this my good friends...  I've gotten them to give Jack some medicine to relax him so he's a little less freaked out and now she goes to clean the already numbed wound.  Only - I guess the numbing paste stuff didn't penetrate all the way into the deep recesses of the wound because as she starts gently squirting it with whatever she was squirting it with - he starts screaming!  MOMMY! IT HURTS, IT HURTS, IT HURTS, MOMMY!!! MAKE HER STOP!!!  It was really fun.  She stopped and got Lidocaine to numb it further.  But as you know, Lidocaine stings like the holy fires of hell for a minute or two - so the entire time she was v.e.r.y.  t.h.o.r.o.u.g.h.l.y. applying Lidocaine to the entire area and for a minute or two more, he was screaming bloody murder.  IT STINGS IT STINGS MOMMY MAKE IT STOP, MOOOOOMMMMMYYYYYY. Sobbing and sobbing.  I swear to god I almost passed out.  I'm not the least little bit squeamish so I was watching what she was doing, waiting for the stuff to fully take effect, willing it to happen faster.  So I don't know if it was that I became squeamish because he is mine - or if it was just the helplessness of having him squeeze my fingers until the bones were rubbing together while he begged me to make it stop or a combination of both - but I started to get all sweaty and the room got a little wavy, and I became all kinds of nauseated, and I was completely afraid I was going to pass out.  I could reach with my leg a little stool on rollers and I got it under me and sat down.  I just knew if Mommy passed out, Jackson would die - so I somehow managed to get myself the fuck over it by concentrating on a picture across the room and mentally leaving for a few minutes - but holy fucking shit that was close.  I am so not a fainter.  I think I've fainted once in my life and that was due to extreme pain.

We're driving home from the hospital and....

Jack: will this be a scar I have for the rest of my life?
Me: It sure will.  We'll have to come up with a good story.
Jack: Well... Teddy's already used the "knife fight" one.
Me: yeah, well I think you could still use it if you wanted to - or, how about Harry Potter's apprentice?
Jack: Hmmm? Yeah.  I haven't earned the rest of the lightening bolt shape, I'll need a few more knives for the zig-zags. 

Apparently he was fine by that point.  (Uh, Jack... Mommy needs a little more time and a lot of alcohol to be able to switch gears back to fine - I'll have to get back to you when I'm there)

Anyway - he ended up with two stitches inside for the muscles (I was surprised it was only two, but it was just such a straight thing she said it went together perfectly) - and 12 stitches outside.  Frankenstein in the making.  I've talked to the most delightful plastic surgeon this morning who completely reassured me and gave me all kinds of wonderful advice for after care and wants to see him in a week to remove the stitches.  And I'm pretty sure that by the time I wake up tomorrow I'll be able to relax some of my muscles.

Before and after pictures - don't look if you get squeamish!

 

29 comments:

~Lisa~ said...

Oh my heavens! Poor baby - poor Mom.. What an awful experience for all of you....

Banded Mommy (Angie) said...

Ohh my God! I probably would have reacted the same way. I am not squeamish or a fainter either but when it is your kids you just seem to take in their pain. So glad he will be ok

Theresa aka Tessie Rose said...

OMG! Poor baby! He looks like he's taking it all in stride. I hope he heals quickly.

Jacquie said...

Poor Jack and poor mama! How is he feeling today? When is daddy coming home so mama can go somewhere hot with nothing to do but have a few drinks with a straw?

Justawallflower said...

I totally would have passed out! Man, I need a drink just reading about it!

Jess said...

Holy shit is right! Poor thing! How awful. Just one more battle wound on a road of cuts and bruises for the kids. Makes ya wish they were bubble boys or something.

Dawnya said...

That scar is going to be AWESOME!!! I love a good knife fight story. He is going to be the man at school. All the girls are going to want his number now.

Read...just breathe and drink...or just drink.

**This here your new Mammy.**

Jen said...

That almost made ME pass the F out! Holy SHIT!!!!!!

Way to go mom for holding it together.

Alison said...

Oh my goodness he really did it didn't he?
You did great, hope that he's feeling better today.

nikki said...

Poor little guy :(

Jen from Oregon said...

Kids! or should I say BOYS! I am a trained paramedic but when it comes to my own... freakoutville!

Nothing worse than your child in pain. Sorry you had to experience this.

Bonnie said...

I don't know how you did it. A few years ago my youngest had a collision with another girl in gym class and got a gash above her eye. Luckily my husband took her to get the stitches because there is no way I could have handled it. Luckily it's right above her eyebrow so you can barely see the scar. Unfortunately scars on girls aren't quite as cool as scars on boys.

Lindsey Lu said...

oh no poor guy!!!!

Shannon said...

what a crazy day! holy crap. I hope he feels better.

amandakiska said...

OMG! Ouch!

Ronnie said...

Boys. Sigh. I hope he figured out a good story for how it happened. :)

Lyla said...

That is quite the gash, little man.

Good for you for pushing through. I recently was with my husband while he got stitches on his face after a basketball game gone-awry and I swear I almost fainted too. I am not squeemish. I've done brain cuttings on a real human baby brain (if anything is going to make you faint, that's it) for goodness sake! But seeing that needle in his face-- ugh.

Did they use that really really thin hair-like thread?

Libby said...

Holy crap! I hope you had a nice litre of vodka waiting for you at home!

Island Bandit said...

ouch. i think i'd have come damned close to passing out too! Poor you and poor Jackson!

FitBy40 said...

I just have to say that your son is absolutely beautiful, scar and all! What gorgeous eyes. This must be the one that Ricky always says "Look at how cute he is...isn't he cute?", and she's right!

Tina said...

He is going to have one good story to tell..it looks much worse after than before :) He could tell everyone about how the emergency room doc beat him. :)

Way to hold it together!!

xxxooo

Camille said...

Ouch!! His stitches look good though and chicks dig scars.

Linda said...

Poor Jackson!! The ER at Howard County is pretty good with kids. I know Cate would have been the same way screaming - she's the worst with Dr.'s so I feel your pain.
Good job Mom!

TheCurvyCat said...

Wow!! He is going to have fun telling that story for years! hehe

I've so been in your shoes, and it's not fun. I got a little woozy when they were stitching up my youngest (then 2) after a dog bite. It's SO different when it's your own little person getting worked on. eep.

Beth Ann said...

Whoa! Ow and ugh!

Something About Kellie said...

OUCH :(

Dizzy Girl said...

Read you have a cute boy! :( Sorry that this happened to him. I have one on my forehead too- and I feel like now (at 33 of course) it gives my face a little character. And I'm FEMALE. Scars on the face usually don't give a girl character- but whatever- it works. Hope it heals up soon!!!

xoxo-

D

Amanda said...

Ohh the joys of being a mommy!!!! He was really brave! So were you!

Pamela E. Williams said...

OMG!! Just reading this made me cringe. Poor Jack!! Poor you!! I hope that he is better.